Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man – Chapter 1
It’s no secret. I’ve had devastatingly tragic luck with men. If you need a refresher and a laugh, read my post on how My Date Farted in My Car.
I don’t know if it’s me or them or a little bit of both, but I’m determined to do my part to meet someone!
*Enter* Steve Harvey’s :
I’m reading through this book (a second time) to learn more about the male psyche (at least from Steve Harvey’s perspective). As I read the book, I’ll be sharing any insight that I gain along the way. I’ll start with :
Chapter 1 : What Drives Men
Apparently, men are driven by, 1. who they are, 2. what they do and 3. how much they make. And until they are comfortable within these 3 categories, they cannot commit to or focus on anything else. This includes relationships.
Women don’t think like this.
Whereas men are driven by life, we are driven by love. As soon as we find the “love of our life”, we’re willing to break our leases, run up our phone bills and put our lives on pause to make things work. Am I lying?
*searches the room for that one woman who’s lying to herself*
I mean, I’ve been guilty of this myself. A couple of years ago, I was presented with an opportunity to work outside of the country. If my boyfriend had asked me to stay, dawg-gone-it, I would have stayed! Luckily for me, he hit me with that “girl bye!” and pretty much packed my bags and opened the front door for me. Needless to say, we are no longer together lol.
The point here is that women oftentimes pursue love with men who are pursuing stability. A man can’t focus on a relationship until he is comfortable with 1. who he is, 2. what he does, and 3. what he makes. Until that time, a relationship is secondary. For how can a man commit himself to a woman, commit himself as her provider…if, in his mind, he doesn’t have anything? And whereas a woman would say, “let’s work on this together”, a man would say :
Now, I’ll never understand this rationale, but that’s because I wasn’t raised in the same manner as a man. Men are taught from a young age that they should be the bread winners, that they should be the providers. And if they’re not, they’re looked at as less manly. Women aren’t given those same lectures. We’re taught to look pretty, switch our hips and wait for a rich one. Lol, totally kidding. But you catch my drift! We were raised differently.
What does this mean in terms of relationships with men?
I think we should take responsibility for learning more about the way that our men think. We can’t expect them to behave and to think the way that we do. They’re not women. If he needs his space, give it to him. If he says he’s not ready for a relationship. Trust me. There isn’t a mountain on earth that you can move to make him ready. Ask any one of Dwight Howard’s six or seven baby mamas. They’ll tell ya!
I think the trick is in finding a man who is comfortable with where he is in life. Only then can he give you the attention that you rightfully deserve.
*wipes forehead*
And that’s only Chapter 1!
Men Really have a Strange kind of thinking